Category Archives: Life

What is “busy”?

I find myself muttering frequently, “why are we all so effing BUSY?” It’s ridiculous. It takes 2 hours and 25 texts for 4 women to decide on a mutual night to celebrate a 50th birthday. FOR. THE. LOVE.

I’ve been mulling it over lately and I realized that actually WE are not really busier, but our children are getting older. All this “new” independence and ages and stages of childhood to adulthood brings entirely new agendas for each kiddo. Truly it is more a matter of keeping up with all the different lives going on and slowly stepping back and letting them manage their own business. Gone are the days of laying out clothes or choosing the blind eye to the ensemble hand-picked by independent young’uns and then off to whatever Mama and Papa had planned. Period end.

Fast forward 18 years, now it is Mama and Papa with their activities and then each kiddo with their own activities. Add it up and that’s a whole lotta colors on the calendar. For us, at this point, some of those colors aren’t really our worry. Some of the colors just involve a little bit of coordination and conversation but not true involvement on the parental unit’s behalf. It is a strange new world. One where I have finally decided that I will forego Open House because I have already been to High School, enjoyed it immensely and have ZERO desire to go back. I do not want to re-live high school through my children’s activities. This is where they begin to spread their own independent wings and start taking ownership of their business. They dang sure don’t need me up in their grill stirring the pot of high school drama. Sometimes that means they screw it up. Sometimes we have to step back in and re-evaluate the way things are taking place and prioritize and time manage. A few steps forward and a bunch more backward. That’s how the baby bird learns to fly, right? That’s also how we un-busy ourselves a little bit more.

And suddenly WE aren’t as busy, but our kids are starting to lead their own lives and it’s a little scary, a lot new and a whole bunch good. I just need to keep repeating that to myself.

Here we are

It’s been a long time coming….

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I totally get the whole snowbird concept now. I also realize that I could ABSOLUTELY be a snowbird. mid-July with windows open, yoga pants on and 2nd cup of coffee on the front porch with my dog mauling a tennis ball—I’m in.

With 3 of our 4 kids we left at 1 a.m. after working all day. Hubs managed about a 4 hour nap and I grabbed a couple of hours on the couch. Our son came home from work and we loaded into the truck. 3 teenagers. 1 extremely confused, 65 pound 10 month old “puppy” and the Hubs and I. A stop at Wawa for coffee and we hit it. About 5 gas/pit stops/puppy walks/driver swaps and 17 hours later we pulled into my Mom and her husband’s home. Just in time for dinner. Play time with their 2 Newfoundlands trying to “love” our pup. Showers. Firefly spotting. Chatting on the back porch. And glorious, horizontal rest in cozy beds.

In the a.m., we were recharged. Hiked with the pup up through a farm and then hit the road for another 7 hours. I will say that I am a beach girl, but the mountains…….a seriously close 2nd place. THAT said, driving white-knuckled THROUGH the mountains during a horrific thunderstorm is not my favorite and will thus keep mountains in 2nd place. However, once arrived, the rain stopped, pizza was eaten and rest was had by all.

Yesterday, the hubs and the pup and I started off with a hike along the river. Later, we hiked with the kids through Lost River Gorge and caverns followed by a 3/4 mile hike STRAIGHT UP the side of the mountain. None of us completed it. The youngest and I quit after the first boulder ascent (she was exhausted and I know the limitations of my knee), our oldest daughter lasted another 20 minutes (about 1/3 of the way) and the hubs and boy came down not long after (perhaps at the 1/2 way point). ‘Twas no joke. Afterward, we rode a bit further to a lake we passed on the way in (during the rain) to explore. A phenomenal refresher after all that climbing.

Beaver Pond

Spaghetti dinner, salad and bread.

Evening moose spotting (we saw one!) and ice cream and we wrapped that day UP!

We are missing our oldest son who is house and cat sitting and working. Adulthood is hard. Sometimes you figure it out at 18, sometimes it’s later. And sometimes you get a “re-do” and have that 2 week vacation that you’ve dreamed of for years. Somehow life works itself out. One way or another.

If you look real hard, you will see my Hubs swimming out to the rock. You would have to look even harder to find a happier man right now.

Psalm 118:24 This is the day that the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it.

Summah time

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I’m truly over hearing about Brock and his foolish speaking father. I’m probably about to do an unpopular post here, but first do not misunderstand me: that kid was wrong. that dad was wrong. that judge was wrong. this entire thing is so. so. so. wrong. The only thing that is good is the two young men who intervened.

There are so many layers of wrong in this entire scenario we could dissect it for days. Which has been done. Over and over again. I’ve stopped reading. Maybe you have, too. You might not even read this, and that’s ok. I’m not reading anymore. Here’s just some of my observations:

Here’s what I haven’t seen:

Accountability. so much excuse-making in the Brock camp: let’s just call a spade a spade, he did wrong. period. end. Stop making excuses and start taking responsibility.
Remorse. So much blah, blah, blah about alcohol, privilege and talent. While I’m quite sure he is sorry now for what he did……it also seems certain that he’s likely not sorry for the right reasons. I can’t help but wonder if this kid was truly, honestly, genuinely remorseful from the very beginning (without his paternal mouthpiece) would we have even seen this story?
Cause. We live in a society that makes big money on exploiting women. Human trafficking is so disgustingly large that we somehow can’t even get a small grip on it. The seed of women-as-objects is so deeply planted in the minds of our boys (and girls) that while eyebrows are raised when a 14 year old wears a skin tight dress to 8th grade graduation, the parents won’t even see what’s wrong with that. I bet they dang sure give the side-eye to any male who takes notice though. Because modesty=prude. This is apparently anytime I take my 5’9″ daughter dress shopping and it takes an act of congress to get a cute dress that actually covers her ass.

Here’s what I have seen:

USA swimming taking the stance that the Judicial system should have taken. BRAVO. BRAV. O.
Privilege and letters of recommendation apparently serve more of a purpose than job applications, or college apps. It truly IS all about who you know. Myth: proven.
Alcohol. Once again a factor. And when it is you can’t count on staying in control or your friends watching your back. It’s a long history through the decades of impaired decisions on both sides and tragedy following. And a whole lot of regret. And shame.
Great posts on the reminder of an ongoing teaching of our boys, girls, young men and young women on the importance of respecting others and standing up for what is right, in spite of what big advertising and society shove down our throats. This conversation should NEVER end. Despite the uncomfortable nature of the topic.
Inconsistency in how a crime is treated. Race. Privilege. Good, Lord. Is it any wonder what a mess our country is in? And with the two top running “candidates” for president, I don’t see any improvement any time soon. Jesus, please come soon!
Mob mentality.

There’s my vent.

making the trek

Trekking through life: Faith, family, friends and a whole lot of coffee!