Category Archives: encouragement

Letting go of perfect

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I saw an instagram pic on Elizabeth Foss‘s account today which was an encouragement in letting go of the journey for perfectionism.  You know the one, where you are running yourself and your family ragged doing everything and doing everything perfectly until you hit that snag and BOOM down comes the house of cards, leaving us wilted, frustrated and maybe even angry.

Elizabeth’s picture reminded me that we are our own worst enemies.  No one is tallying up our laundry piles, dirty dishes, extracurricular activities and perfect baked goods for the umpteenth bake sale.  We are the ones doing that, no one else.

The picture was perfectly timed for me today.  Hubby and I both had evening meetings tonight and somehow shuffling our daughter to cheer practice in between.  It’s been a long week and frankly, it’s been a long two weeks!  In this picture, it triggered something in me….the world WILL go on if I miss the occasional meeting (actually it will go on if I miss every meeting) and our evening will become a lot less hectic and rushed.  And I was able to give myself that permission.  Permission to let it go, permission to stop running for a minute and just catch my breath.  I was able to make dinner for my family (really good, see tomorrow’s post for recipe!), not stress about getting our daughter to practice–which was great since the Hubs hit traffic and never would have made it in time.  Time to shower.  In fact, Hubby also skipped his meeting.

It wasn’t a total bon-bon night, but it was a good breather and exercise in letting go of perfect.  An exercise I come back to time and again.

So, keep those Instagrams pretty but hey, let’s keep it real, too.  Life IS good, but it sure isn’t perfect and there is much encouragement in the reality.

It’s been a long time coming….

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I totally get the whole snowbird concept now.  I also realize that I could ABSOLUTELY be a snowbird.  mid-July with windows open, yoga pants on and 2nd cup of coffee on the front porch with my dog mauling a tennis ball—I’m in.

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With 3 of our 4 kids we left at 1 a.m. after working all day.  Hubs managed about a 4 hour nap and I grabbed a couple of hours on the couch.  Our son came home from work and we loaded into the truck.  3 teenagers.  1 extremely confused, 65 pound 10 month old “puppy” and the Hubs and I.  A stop at Wawa for coffee and we hit it.  About 5 gas/pit stops/puppy walks/driver swaps and 17 hours later we pulled into my Mom and her husband’s home.  Just in time for dinner.  Play time with their 2 Newfoundlands trying to “love” our pup.  Showers.  Firefly spotting.  Chatting on the back porch.  And glorious, horizontal rest in cozy beds.

In the a.m.,  we were recharged.  Hiked with the pup up through a farm and then hit the road for another 7 hours.  I will say that I am a beach girl, but the mountains…….a seriously close 2nd place.  THAT said, driving white-knuckled THROUGH the mountains during a horrific thunderstorm is not my favorite and will thus keep mountains in 2nd place.  However, once arrived, the rain stopped, pizza was eaten and rest was had by all.

Yesterday, the hubs and the pup and I started off with a hike along the river.  Later, we hiked with the kids through Lost River Gorge and caverns followed by a 3/4 mile hike STRAIGHT UP the side of the mountain.  None of us completed it.  The youngest and I quit after the first boulder ascent (she was exhausted and I know the limitations of my knee), our oldest daughter lasted another 20 minutes (about 1/3 of the way) and the hubs and boy came down not long after (perhaps at the 1/2 way point).  ‘Twas no joke.  Afterward, we rode a bit further to a lake we passed on the way in (during the rain) to explore.   A phenomenal refresher after all that climbing.

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Beaver Pond

Spaghetti dinner, salad and bread.

Evening moose spotting (we saw one!) and ice cream and we wrapped that day UP!

We are missing our oldest son who is house and cat sitting and working.  Adulthood is hard.  Sometimes you figure it out at 18, sometimes it’s later.  And sometimes you get a “re-do” and have that 2 week vacation that you’ve dreamed of for years.  Somehow life works itself out.  One way or another.

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If you look real hard, you will see my Hubs swimming out to the rock.  You would have to look even harder to find a happier man right now.

Psalm 118:24  This is the day that the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it.

 

Fitbit fun

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So I joined the fitbit party.  At work we are having a corporate-wide “Eat Right for Life” challenge and since I am already tracking my food (week 1–mostly tracked, definitely an improvement) I thought this would be a good addition.

And you might have read my recent post on how I’m not super motivated because quite frankly I’m comfortable, but……in all reality…..I do believe menopause is on the horizon.  So, I thought maybe I should put a little effort forth and be in my best fighting shape (plus I am reading diet MAY help with the hot flashes and holy heckfire…..if it does, I.  AM.  ALL.  IN. If not, I end up a little healthier, right?  Plus, I have a slight competitive side and am visually motivated, so when I see I am 2,000 steps short of my 10,000 for the day; I lace up and hit it until my wrist vibrates.  Done.

But my favorite part of the fitbit?  In addition to the heart rate feature and watch?  The sleep feature!  Oh my goodness.  I am ridiculously anticipating each morning’s sync so I can see how many times I was restless, woke up, how long it took me to sleep and how much sleep I actually got.  Weird, I know.  But it is SOOOOO COOL!!!

Anyhoo….I am on the lookout for a cuter wrist band or figure out how to make one, but in the meantime trying to get over my frustration of today since I forgot to put it on after my shower and pulled a shift at the hospital where I KNEW I’d bank serious steps, but alas, the steps were still banked, just not logged.  Life will go on.

Changes. Challenges.

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Door challenge

Door challenge

I absolutely won’t be trying this #doorchallenge anytime soon….my aching back just watching these girls get into this position and then reverse and then again.  But they did it.  And grammed it.  Challenge: complete.

My own challenge comes in form of a new job.  Sort of.  What?  Yup.  After a decade with the same company and my degree just sitting on its haunches, I happened into a position with the competition (also a far larger organization).  While, the initial position is essentially a lateral move, the potential for growth is better and with a large, well-run organization there are countless other benefits.

I can’t explain it, but there is a tremendous sense of peace in this decision both with myself and with the Hubs.  The peace, I am certain, lies in the job itself opening to a Full-time position when I wasn’t even looking.  Good friends, old friends, who unknown to me at the time, were background cheerleaders to the powers that be before and after my interview.  The timing is quick, with little time to second-guess and drag it out.  Basically, knock, open, go in.   God is in control.  Fully.  With no doubt.  And I’ve been here before, when He opened the door to our house.  Sometimes, those prayers of “Please….God….I am dense and thick and need you to make this clear as day”, really DO get answered.  Not always right away, not always the way I think I want them to be answered, but it does happen.  And it’s just WOW.  Really.  Wow.

I mean, I know NO one at this office.  It’s brand new, Opening day is September 8.  My 7 minute drive and 5 mile world just opened up to about a 30-ish minute commute and a 20-something mile world.  What.  The.  Heck.  It’s all good though and clearly I’ll have more time for phone calls and podcasts with additional time in the car.

It will be an interesting year ahead and I’m excited to see what lies ahead.  It’s time.  And I’m up for the challenge!  So, here’s hoping I’m hopping from the fire to the pan and not vice versa!

 

Beauty and the judge

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At a football game for my daughter’s cheer squad I saw a young girl (maybe a mom, not sure) with the tiniest of tank tops (barely covering the important parts) and the shortest of shorts in white.  She sat with the football players.  I sat with my jaw to the ground.

At the produce store, a young girl in a barely there t-shirt and bikini bottoms prancing around.

At an interview and struggling to maintain eye contact as cleavage joins in the interview process. 

I have a confession to make.   I am incredibly judgemental.  I try not to be, but truth be told; I judge.  Hard.  It’s a struggle.  Sometimes, it’s because I care enough to point out the obvious, i.e. shorts too short/tight/ripped, etc.  Sometimes it’s within the limits of my own children and setting boundaries and sometimes I turn the ugly, judgemental eye….think along the lines of “What not to wear”.  The irony of it all, is I am no fashion maven and have had enough “what not to wear” moments that Stacey and Clinton should be here yesterday with their $5000 and help a sister out. But.  It’s not the fashion mishaps that concern me (mostly, I find THOSE highly entertaining and educational) it’s the blatant sexism in fashion and the lowering of the moral bar in what should be deemed acceptable. Starting in the toddler section and it doesn’t stop there.

Our girls have been blessed some truly awesome hand-me-downs in the past, however, a large portion of those clothes just kept on going out the door to the thrift store due to inappropriateness.  I mean, do we REALLY need to see ass-crease with every pair of shorts???  We’ve had several talks.  Together. One on one.  At the table.  In the car.  In the stores.  They know exactly where Dad and I stand in what’s allowable (basically school dress code=family dress codes for most things…but not flip-flops, I mean, c’mon…we live in Florida!).  For the most part, they abide by the rules.  In truth, they do each own a pair or two of hootchie shorts, however, they are mainly for the house or sleeping in.  Sometimes, they make it out though.  The point is, we and they are trying and trying hard.

Most importantly, I think they are receiving the message of modesty and the importance of what you wear and the message it sends.  Incredibly difficult is short shopping, dress shopping and back to school shopping (which sadly is upon us).  Challenging also in peer circles and learning to stand your ground and making your parent’s message yours.

Such a tough battle and a constant fight in staying modest.  We can’t advertise sex 24/7 from age toddler up and expect no problems.  Yes, I know that what you wear should be what you want to, but this is life and life isn’t fair.

So I judge.  And I use those judgements as teachable moments.  Mostly.  For the other times, well…..I’m working on that and I have this handy-dandy Matthew to keep me company.

Matthew 7: 1-3  (NASB)

7 “Do not judge so that you will not be judged. 2 For in the way you judge, you will be judged; and [a]by your standard of measure, it will be measured to you. 3 Why do you look at the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye?

Matthew 7:1-5 (The Message)

7 1-5 “Don’t pick on people, jump on their failures, criticize their faults— unless, of course, you want the same treatment. That critical spirit has a way of boomeranging. It’s easy to see a smudge on your neighbor’s face and be oblivious to the ugly sneer on your own. Do you have the nerve to say, ‘Let me wash your face for you,’ when your own face is distorted by contempt? It’s this whole traveling road-show mentality all over again, playing a holier-than-thou part instead of just living your part. Wipe that ugly sneer off your own face, and you might be fit to offer a washcloth to your neighbor.

**Bible verses from the Bible Gateway

And then…this video making ALL the noise.  And it really fits in.  With the immodest dressing.  Overmakeup.  Trying too hard.  I shared it with my girls and I want to work harder by leading by example, otherwise it’s just words, right?  So, thank you, Colbie!!

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/07/13/colbie-caillat-try_n_5581951.html