Martha, your enterprise is safe. For now….

Our youngest turned 9 last week and since I had the day off for her birthday, I agreed to make the cake she requested:  Red velvet with cream cheese icing AND chocolate with chocolate icing….layered up.  OK.  No prob.  I am sure her vision was something like this:

OK, maybe we watch too much Cake Boss….besides she knows me too well. I don’t even have a tiny square pan like the top layer!!

**image by

More likely, her visions were of this type of cake…(just imagine some chocolate layers between the red velvet….)

I actually HAVE made a few layered numbers sorta, kinda similar to this. Really. I just can’t find the pictures right now…..
Image by

Off to Publix I went.  And lo and freaking behold, there was not ONE red velvet cake mix.  WTHeck!??!  So, I went on my phone, pulled up a recipe (which took FOREVAH–the signal is lousy in that store!) and procured the ingredients.  Confident of my preparations and time frame, back home I went.

Turns out, between the two cake batters I had enough for cupcakes, too!  BONUS!  This was going to be a spectacular cake.

When I began to smell burning cake (8 minutes before the timer went off) I quickly removed the pans and checked for done-ness.  With the exception of one pan, everything was ready.

The problem was that the red velvet layer cooked too quickly on the bottom.  So I brought out my serrated knife to cut off that portion.  The cake itself was moist and lovely, hence…the darn thing began to crumble as I cut off the burnt portion.

Crumble-palooza, Summer 2012!!

The issues continued as the second pan didn’t QUITE come out intact (apparently I missed a spot with the spray…)

I decided on making the best of it.  I cut the red velvet layer in two, turned it upside down and began to frost.  Then layering with the chocolate layer and “gluing” it together with frosting–there is no such thing as too much frosting, by the way.  Topped it with the red velvet layer and then used cupcakes to hold the darn thing together and up (as for some reason it was now leaning to the side…).

As I surveyed the damage final result, I pondered running back to Publix and purchasing one of their ready-to-go FANCY SCHMANCY cakes, but my husband said, “it will still taste OK.”

As our daughter arrived home from VBS, I Happy birthday-ed her to death, oohed and ahhed over her 9-year-old self and buttered her up for the sell.  She paused as she took in the confectionary conundrum, listened to her sister as she assisted in the sell (God LOVE that girl!!!) and turned with the biggest smile ever, “That is so COOL!!!”.  Phew.  Crisis averted.

**on a side note, my girlfriend recently revealed to me that she often enjoys “Cake in a bag”, the result of an ALMOST  thrown away iced cake (can you even IMAGINE such a travesty!?!?!) and that yes, indeed, even if it looks awful, it DOES still taste good.  I was clinging to that hope.

So. For now.  Martha Stewart has nothing to fear.  Give me time and perhaps a little patience, attention to detail and a concern about what other people think…..and look out.  So, until then….VOILA!

ZEE Masterpiece, non?

Throw a bunch of candles on it and there you go! Smiles!!

The leftover carnage….and yes, it was AWESOME! (especially the red velvet part)

To recreate this baking WONDER, I pulled the Red Velvet recipe from HERE.  As for the rest.  Any chocolate cake mix.  And throw all your cares out the window and let ‘er rip!  Bon Appetit!!

Galations 5:22 -23

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.

4 thoughts on “Martha, your enterprise is safe. For now….

  1. pamasaurus

    I had a similar experience with the cake I made for my daughter’s birthday this weekend. It, too, tasted delicious despite looking like a hot mess 😉


  2. Mary

    Oh, Tracy! This one sure had me laughing! The things we go through to make our kids birthday wishes come true! Glad it passed the test with the birthday girl!



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