Category Archives: Life

#Affluenza: are you kidding me?

It seems we’ve come to a whole new low in society, the final fruit of a generation of spoiled children and parents who (it would seem) have failed to set boundaries and actually parent their offspring.

If you aren’t familiar with the story of Ethan Couch in Texas and his attorney’s outrageously SUCCESSFUL plea of Affluenza as a defense in his drunk driving that left FOUR people dead, by all means click HERE or do your own Googling, there’s plenty of fodder.   The gist of the story, as I see it, is that there are a group of young people (and for the minute, let’s leave affluence out of this) that steal beer, get drunk, drive and wind up killing 4 people and left 2 with serious injuries.  This week the judge in the case sentenced Ethan to 10 years probation and a long-term treatment facility and NO JAIL TIME.  Just chew on that a minute.  It’s like grizzle, you simply cannot swallow that.

Parents, we have a DUTY to parent our children.  Perhaps no one told us,or maybe we just weren’t listening/believing, but the sad fact is that parenting is the hardest flippin’ job EVERRRRRRRRRRRRR.  From the time our sweet and precious bundle crosses the threshold of placenta to oxygen it is Game On.  No joke.  Sleepless nights and sleep-deprived  parenting, potty training and 2-year-old defiance parenting, sibling rivalry and sharing parenting, school days and friendship parenting, tween angst and teen independence parenting, college life and young adult parenting and then…..then….then…..we can be friends.  First we must parent.  That, folks, is a marathon, so best fuel up!!!

Parenting means loving those kids and setting boundaries.  Let’s clarify:

bound·a·ry
ˈbound(ə)rē/
noun
plural noun: boundaries
a line that marks the limits of an area; a dividing line.
Failure to set those boundaries leads to confusion when our kids are trying to figure it out for themselves.  I’m not advocating helicopter parenting, however, I AM all for setting up expectations and explanations of WHY we set limits and the consequences and following through.  The follow through is the hardest part and the most crucial, otherwise, where is the lesson learned?  And lo, there are MANY, MANY lessons to be learned, and some a few times before the lesson is mastered.
Currently, our 8th grader has had a semester of slacking to the max in his math class.  Now, it IS an 11th grade math class and we don’t expect an “A”; we DO expect effort.  The effort has been lacking to the tune of a D/F which has resulted in some pretty uncomfortable consequences.  Those consequences have resulted in 1)renewed focus, 2)more attentive and interactive child, 3)renewed vigor on task, 4)completed assignments, 5)increased understanding, 6) D/F to a C and 7)mature and tremendous communication among us and our son. It’s a challenge and sadly, we’ve done this last year and apparently we have short-term memory in this house at times and need to repeat lessons, however, as seen with our 10th grader….they DO learn, apply and adjust with much fruit to be shown.  Like I said earlier, it’s flippin’ hard; parenting is hard.
In the words of Nike,  JUST DO IT.  and then do it again.  and again.  and again.
Otherwise, we will have more BS “Affluenza” nonsense diagnoses to deal with rather than just calling a spade a spade.  If you mess up, there are consequences and if you REALLY mess up….there are REAL consequences.
Ethan (like MANY before him) made a terrible and tragic choice that dealt consequences that he will deal with mentally for the rest of his life.  Sadly, his consequences aren’t much different from the coddling that led to his poor choices.  Mamas and Papas, come on, let us ALL buckle down and hold our kids accountable for the choices they make, because Lord knows the mess we are in for when we don’t.
Galations 6:7-9
Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, this he will also reap.For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life. Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary.

When you’re up waaaaaaaay too early

Up Early

Hubby is the early riser.  Don’t get me wrong, I’m a morning person for certain, but he’s Mr. Up and at ’em and wants to chat and discuss and GO.  His body clock is pretty regular at o’dark hundred, even when he wants to sleep in.  THIS  morning however, I was up with him.  Let’s call it 4 a.m. because that’s when I finally looked at the clock.  After tossing, turning, chatting, concentrating on breathing, yada, yada, yada…we both got up.  4:30.  A.M.  What the?????

So what DO people do when they are up at ridiculously early hours?  Here’s a little peek-a-boo:

Drink coffee.  Lots.  Gingerbread coffee…in…the…house!!!

Daily Readings.  Advent Devotional (thanks, Ali).  Git my head and heart on straight!

Skim news.  While the rest of the country prepares to be frozen out in the super near future, I’m completely irritated that not only is our A/C ON, but part of the reason we woke up was because it was too hot.  We had to turn on the ceiling fan.  For.  The.  Love.

Check Facebook.  There are a few birthdays happening and catching up on pictures.  #photostalker

Read blogs.  This one from Momastery was particulary good.

Pinterest.  Adding this clean eating fudge  (thanks, Shan!) AND these not AT ALL clean eating Egg nog cookies (thanks, Lisa!) for our work party next week.

Pricing freezers for the garage.  YESSSSSSS!!!!  (Woo hoo, Amanda!)

Next up….

Oatmeal.

More coffee.

Pay bills.

Plan meals for week and grocery list.

Plan our Happy Birthday, Jesus party with my grandparents.  This whole shorter Advent season is the pits.  Someone put Thanksgiving back where it belongs, OK?  Thanks!

Sometimes, it takes LOTS of prayer

Life isn’t always pretty or easy or fun.  Life in a big family can just get plain crazy.  Sometimes it all comes to a head at once.  This is where I find God truly has a sense of humor.  He knows I’m easily agitated by prolonged chaos, noise and things generally going in opposition to MY plan; so He gave us 4 children so that I can work on that.  Repeatedly.

This Sunday, the first day of Advent I trekked it Mass with the kiddos (Hubby was working at went to vigil Mass Saturday) and they just took turns fraying my nerves with bickering, 16yo crisis of faith moments, etc etc.  By the time we sat in the pew all I could do was pull out my devotional and start pounding the prayers.  Any.  And.  Every.  Prayer. I.  Could.  Find.  All before the opening song.  Good times, I tell you.  Then I found this one that I never noticed before and I thought I’d share:

Father, 

Sometimes the family gets me down.

The children are noisy and bills pile up.

Relatives and friends make demands of my time and attention. 

I try to keep first things first and create and atmosphere where Your name is honored.  Your word observed.

But I get tired and a hard edge creeps into my voice.  Help me to cope with the daily strains of living in a family.

Help me to sustain a climate in which my partner can grow in Your love, to encourage my children to develop fully the talent You have given them and to make of my family the community of your love the Your Son came to bring.

Amen. 

I don’t know.  It spoke to me.  It worked for me.  The bickering stopped.  The 16 yo came around.  By the “sign of peace” all was restored and the day went on and we began the process of decorating and cookie making and I just shook my head at God and wondered how He does it, why I am worthy and so grateful He does.

ThankFULL

‘Twas a different Thanksgiving for us this year.  Mom and her Hubs stayed home in PA, sis and her family stayed put in Tally, my mother-in-law’s sister passed away last week and understandably they just weren’t up for anything and my step-dad and his family had his 1st wife and sister and boyfriend  in town (awkward and loud and weird).  so we stayed put.  and cooked.  and enjoyed dinner with my grandparents.  This is how the day went down:

The morning started out brisk at 37 DEGREES!!!! and warmed up to the 60’s.

Macy’s day parade on for our viewing pleasure whilst cooking the bird and organizing the side dishes.  (for me, I don’t get all crazy so it’s not the cooking but the TIMING of it all that makes me a little wired, and somehow it always works out even though I’m not sure HOW….but it does).

Finished up the Christmas cards (ready to mail tomorrow, don’t hate, but I truly can’t wrap my head around Christmas shopping until this is done.  it’s the way I am and I’m ok with that).  Sadly, I ran out of labels and had to hand write 1/2 of my cards!  However, if my friend who sends at least TWICE what I send can do it, I’ll zip it…but those labels???  They are on the grocery list; THAT won’t happen again!

IMG_5755

A little bike ride with our youngest around the ‘hood left me wishing I wore my gloves.  I’m a baby, I know.  Blame it on my thin Florida blood.

Appetizers at 1.  Mountain Dew, it’s what the 16 year old brings home when you send him for drinks and Triscuits.

who knew the goat cheese and cranberry would be such a hit?

who knew the goat cheese and cranberry would be such a hit?

Dinner 1:30 ish.

I guess I didn't need the WHOLE 5 lb bag of potatoes....

I guess I didn’t need the WHOLE 5 lb bag of potatoes….

The kids opted to eat outside

The kids opted to eat outside and so did the cat, thankfully.

we use these dishes ALL month long!!

we use these dishes ALL month long!!

Caramel got his first turkey ever.  loved it.

Caramel got his first turkey ever. loved it.

 

Pie 3 ish with a little fire pit action.

Shower and PJs by 5:30.  Is that so wrong?  It sure didn’t feel like it!!  Then……

Ordered my Free Shutterfly calendar for 2014 (use FREECAL as the promo code until Monday.  I think.  not sure.)

Ordered Nutcracker tickets for the girls and I for our annual ballet and cupcake fix.

Washed fire pit clothes.

Blogged.

Read.

Slept.

How was YOUR Thanksgiving?  Hopefully blessed!!

 

 

WIWS and other weekend craziness

Full shot

Full shot

I’ve not linked up with the fashionably forward ladies at FLAP in a while, but to be fair, I haven’t been blogging a ton lately.  Life is fully back into school and activities mode and there are only so many hours in the day.  You KNOW this, I know.  That’s the truth and I’m just getting it in when I can.

Aaaaaaaand, our oldest girl and I went thrifting yesterday and I simply HAD to share my outfit.  Thrift winning!

 

keep

IMG_5632This is me showing you:  my fave necklace, shirt detailing and MY HAIR.  I actually did my hair.  Looks the same right?  Yep.  That’s why I don’t really do my hair.  It always looks the same to me.  Whatever.

Outfit Details:

Pants…just love the pinstriping (?) is that what it is…khaki and brown.  Can’t go wrong there. $1

Shirt….Love.  This.  Shirt.  All of my colors and super sassy.  $2

Shoes….Aerosoles, BROWN, slides and $2.  yes, thank you.

Jewelry:  not thrifted, but some pieces my beloved Lia Sophia collection.  Call me sucker.

For other weekend news:

Friday night after work and kid pickup/dropoff/pickup/pickup, Hubby and I went to a 50th birthday dinner.  The couple goes to our church and he wanted to do his signature BBQ ribs to celebrate.  In.  Had me at BBQ and me not cooking.   We also met a few other folks from church there (although I only remember about 2 names…I do poorly in large groups) and our associate priest was there as well.  It was a really nice time, great food, good conversation and just so nice to FINALLY be socializing with people from church OUTSIDE church.  It only took 10 years.  Whatever, that’s a whole other post simmering….

Saturday was thrifting and cleaning.  Productive AND fun.

Today I helped our 6th grader do her Science Experiment for her Science project due next week.  I was the photographer.  At Mass  our 8th grader was recognized for his accomplishment in making All State Orchestra for his French Horn.  It’s been a big weekend.

Now swing by the FLAP girls and check out the rest of the ladies!

Happy Veteran’s Day and have a great week!

Blessings!!