Category Archives: Changes

Contradeception

Yesterday’s post was fun and girly and….Holy Cow…had my second highest views of all time.  There is no denying that fashion is FUN!!  Fashion is fun because we, as women, like to feel pretty and feminine; the kicker is….God made us that way.  We are softer than men, we have less upper body strength than men, we are nurturers and caregivers, it is our nature; that is a GOOD thing.  Why do we fight it?  Today I am posting a brief my sweet friend, Carrie, wrote regarding our femininity.  It’s great food for thought with the election tomorrow, not to mention how we view ourselves and the creature God made us to be.  It may or may not sway your vote, however, I hope it helps to solidify the reality of what it is when we are made WOMAN.  Blessings!!  And if you haven’t already…go vote tomorrow!!

“Why ain’t a boy in a hundred gets to whitewash an illustrious fence like this one,”

The infamous Tom Sawyer spoke intently, baiting the first of many friends who passed by his lousy post, convincing them to exchange their prized possessions for an opportunity to do his dirty work.

“He had discovered a great law of human action, without knowing it” Author Mark Twain narrates, “ Namely, that in order to make a man or a boy, covet a thing, it is only necessary to make the thing difficult to attain.”

The rapidly approaching presidential election reflects this dark principle of human nature. By exploiting a cause, one can run on an appalling record and still influence votes. After all, in order to make a girl or a woman covet a thing, it is only necessary to tell her a man can do it.

Our Commander-in-Chief, during the debate on domestic affairs, pledged to do all he can to afford woman the same opportunities as men. He asserted, woman in our country and around the world have been subject to grave injustices. Woman like Lily Ledbetter who worked many years making less money than her male equivalent without justice and well deserved recognition had top billing.

The media conversation in the days following the debate centered on what they called the war on women. Hearing the countless horror stories on the news of so many nameless women who have been denied pay, protection and sadly, dignity, are impossible and impermissible to ignore. We grieve that women in our own backyard have starved to feed their families, have been objectified and abandoned. War has been waged and Americans know they cannot sit idly by. America needs a pro-women candidate and Barack Obama is confident he is the guy.

His bold response to the inequality:  More contraception:  mandatory coverage for all. Stopping at nothing to ensure every prescription is filled and every womb empty because all of our womanly woes obviously stem from a lack of available contraception.

As women, we have suffered many fates at the hand of this illustrious pill;  yet our government wants us to open wide to swallow yet another dose of deception. Is this the revolution American women have been longing for? Do we need protection from our threatening reproductive systems, our broken bodies that every month do this crazy thing called ovulate. Are we really that naïve?

The pill our president peddles is not only detrimental to our health but to our society at large. Over the last century our country has endured a rapid moral decline; one that not-so-coincidentally coincides with the wide-spread availability of the pill. American women are smart enough to understand the correlation but sufficiently terrified of their own femininity and choose to ignore it.

The readily available statistics of the abuse and objectification of women and families in America are staggering. Is it not enough that more than half the women in America are without spouses, half the children live without at a father or a mother in their home, and millions of innocent children are ripped from their mother’s wombs when the cure-all first line of defense fails?

There is war on women. Femininity is being assaulted by those that claim who we are made to be as women, is simply not good enough.

Take a look in the mirror, ladies. Seriously take a long, deep, gaze at your bare outline.

Now take a second look, beyond the shame and unrealistic expectations about what the world tells you your femininity ought to resemble. This time, what do you see?

Behold, the glorious feminine frame, curves, breasts and the intricate lines that cover our most captivating capacity, our ability to nurture life. You are beautiful!

Femininity is not a disease, it is privilege. We don’t need a cure, or the hollow and dangerous promises that come at a devastating cost to our very nature as women. We do not want to hand over our most prized possession, the truth of our femininity, to partake in a dirty agenda. We can no longer pretend to be something we are not. Who we are is undeniably etched in our existence. We are worth infinitely more. Why ain’t every girl in a hundred liberated by this truth?

What doesn’t kill us….

Do you ever seem as though you can get so easily caught in a vortex of despair?  (Currently, I am fine…but lately there are many around me suffering and each challenge seems to bring forth a new and fresh hell for someone else).  There is so much suffering around ALL of us.  Each of us with our own drama and issues to deal with and then to meld together as we swim our way through.  Thus is life.  Fluid and changing.

John 16:33 

I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”

One of my favorite lyrics (and all-time sayings) in Kelly Clarkson’s song…..”What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” is so true; it’s not the trials we face….because we ALL have crosses to bear throughout our lives…it is how we deal with those trials and when we rise above…we are stronger.

Last night I read my friend Lea’s blog and she put up this great poem and even better pictures to remind me that we are not only made stronger by life’s trials but more beautiful.  Looking at the pictures of these beautiful ladies and friends and looking back on the years….it’s true.  

“The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat,

known suffering,

known struggle,

known loss,

and have found their way out of the depths.

These persons have an appreciation,

a sensitivity,

and an understanding of life

that fills them with compassion,

gentleness,

and a deep loving concern.

Beautiful people do not just happen.”

 

                       Elisabeth Kübler-Ross (1926-2004); psychiatrist, author

Teacher duty day…1/4 of the school year: DONE!

And this Friday finds our lovely children home with Hubby (as he actually tries to work with them around…good luck with that, babe!) as their teachers put together report cards wrapping up the first 9 week period of the school year.  And you’ll find me…..at work.  Whatever.  At least I’m not waking/dragging kids out of bed, to the breakfast table and then herding them through general hygiene and dress to the car.  A little break, if you will.  I’ll take it.  You’ll also find me “groupie-style” with Jennifer Fulwiler and peeps throwing down some Quick takes…7 to be exact.

1)  I’ve lost my way this week.  Eating healthy that is.  It started with my sister and nephews in town for the weekend (I always like to blame my sister….it feels comfortable…), then rolled into a potluck lunch at work and now here it is Friday and I’m wondering where in the HECK did my mojo go???    Fortunately, I’m still moving.  Each day I seem to pull it together a little more, however, it’s KOOKOO (for cocoa puffs) KRAZAY what sugar does to you….it’s like a drug.  Serious.  C’mon, just a taste.  Everyone’s doing it.  Before you know it…it’s Friday and your body is all kinds of confused and begging you to just.  walk.  away.

2)  We let our oldest stay home from school one day.  End of the semester.  The older grades were doing PSAT testing and the 9th graders were stuck in home room all day.  Not to fear though….I left him a list.  *finish driving permit practice test *laundry.  all of it. *dishwasher *vacuum house*mow lawn. front and back.  and neighbors.  front and back. It was sooooo nice to come home to a clean and tidy house.  We should keep him home more often…

3)  I had to make a difficult decision in the best interest of someone else this week.  Sadly this resulted in cutting out a treasured annual trip.  However, in doing so, and receiving affirmation from a friend in my decision, it was an incredibly FAST and certain answer to prayer.  I’m not sure what God has in store for ME that weekend, but I know He’ll be busy and I’m happy to not be an obstacle, but rather an intercessor, and that’s OK.  The most important work ALWAYS happens behind the scenes.

4)  Our girl has her cheer competition this weekend and each practice I’m more amazed at how these girls have put so much effort in over these past few weeks and to see this routine come together.  Tonight, I actually got a lump in my throat as they practiced in front of the older and younger cheer groups.  Pathetic, I know.  What can I say?  I’m a sap.  Her first year cheering and of this I am sure:  Sunday will be quite the experience that is a certainty.  Which also means the season is almost over.  Can I get an AMEN?!??!  **note to self, grab earplugs from MRI tomorrow….

5)  We are one week into the Read the Catechism in a Year for the year of Faith.  I must say, I am truly enjoying it.  So is Hubby!  It’s in small bite size pieces (so far) and it’s a great Faith discussion for us to focus on TOGETHER during this year.

6)  It’s Biketoberfest here.  Thinking about taking my camera this weekend and shooting some frames.  An interesting mix.  Soccer. Football. Romney/Ryan. Cheer comp.  Bikes.  We live in an interesting and eclectic area.  Fo’ sho!

7)  Now that I’ve stayed up too late…it’s time to go to bed….and get a walk in before work.  Because I can.  Happy Friday, all and have a super weekend!!

**in reference to a portion of #6, I will NOT be attending…mainly due to time constraints and kid activities, also I really don’t enjoy getting stuck in traffic, etc.  I’m good, I’ve made up my mind….I completely agree with Calah Alexander on her article about Politics…I’m pretty sure she wrote it for ME…though with many more actual facts…I’m not really a detail person, so thanks, Calah!!

Final update…

Well, 5 weeks and I made it through the Peak 313 Challenge.  It was a good jump-start to getting a little more disciplined and NOT getting sidelined by life with healthier eating and exercise habits.  For me, it’s more on the eating side, the exercise thing–I got it.  I just enjoy food.  I enjoy making it, serving it and fellowshipping with and around it.  I just need to make friends with it.  As my friend commented to me during this challenge, “I am eating for fuel…not just eating”.  True.

So, to report…the scale didn’t really budge much, which is disappointing and truth be told, can quite easily depress me into a return to emotional eating.  However…..my clothes are fitting looser and I have more energy, so I am motivated and encouraged to continue on with my journey…and if I’m making good choices and treating this body as the temple that it is and nothing changes on the scale then I’ll work on making peace with that, too.

And that’s OK.

Blessings!!

1Corinthians 6:19

Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own?

Mall lock-ins and letting go

This weekend our oldest daughter joined the Girl Scouts by indoctrination at the annual Mall Lock-in.  The event involves hundreds of Girl Scouts and their leaders as they spend the night in the local mall (a girl’s dream, right?).  There is a DJ, photo booth, dancing, contests, 2 of the local colleges had activities and cheerleaders to entertain the girls, some of the stores were open for shopping and you could even sleep if you wanted to.  There was a 2 a.m. pick up option or a 5:30 am. pick up option; figuring if we were going to do…we’d DO IT…5:30 a.m. it was.  The girl had a blast.  Made new friends.  Shopped.  Danced.  Played games.  And didn’t sleep.  It was an event that was out of our comfort zone, however, we could see it as a growing experience and an opportunity to spread her wings.  They all have to at some point and we all have our way of going about it in this parenting game.

A while back I read this article about a family in New York as they documented letting their young son navigate the Subway system solo.  I swear I got angina just reading it and you can, too…written by Lenore Skenazy, NY Sun article.  However, after I processed what I read, I realized we ALL parent differently.  I am a suburban beach girl, through and through.  My visit to a real-deal CITY gives me neck pain because I can’t stop craning my neck (so touristy, I know–can’t help it) in awe and amazement at the buildings towering all around me.  The Subway gave me palpitations, I was certain we’d get lost.  It’s not what I am used to and my internal GPS is seriously flawed, just ask my Hubby.  This family, however, IS used to it.  Their son is used to it.  His managing the subway is a critical skill he’ll need and the sooner he masters it, the better he’ll be at getting around in HIS city.  Knowing how to get home is a skill we ALL need.

Our children have their own privileges for getting around our town.  And some of my friends shudder at what we allow them to do.  Bicycling for hours with friends.  Bus system to get across 3 towns over to skateboard all day.  It comes with time.  We’ve set the foundation.  Taught them how to find their way around town with landmarks, street signs, etc.  Hubby rode the bus with our oldest son to show him how to navigate the terminal, bus changes and taught him how to read the map and learn the stops.  It’s nerve-wracking and yet it makes them amazingly independent, self-sufficient and more responsible as these are privileges not a God-given right.  As our girls get older, I am certain their privileges will be different from the boys, but they will eventually spread their wings as well.  It won’t be any less gut-wrenching.

We can all go insane with the what-ifs and the what-abouts and the reality is those scenarios will ALWAYS be there regardless of city, suburbia or country.  Danger is everywhere.  All you have to do is open the paper or the internet.  Every time I do I want to erect a compound that is self-sufficient and never leave or let my children leave.  Then reality hits.  God has given us these children, HIS children, on loan and it’s a huge responsibility to bear.  One we don’t fully understand until our children become less dependent on us.  Our job as parents is to do what we can to protect our children, physically, mentally, spiritually.  They do grow up.  Each child can manage responsibility differently and knowledge is power.  We can’t live in fear.  Helicoptering them does them no favors now or later.

Raise up a child in the way he should go, even when he is old he will not depart from it.  Proverbs 22:6

As parents we have to strike a balance between helicopter parenting and zero supervision.  It’s so hard.  Helicoptering makes it easy because we are the adults and life experience helps us to just DO IT ALL for our kids.  It’s easier for us to just do it, unfortunately they learn nothing from it, other than mom/dad will do it.  Zero supervision is sink or swim.  Some kids make it out OK, but it’s a tough road, fraught with LOTS of bumps and bruises.  Kids need example.  Regardless of which end of the spectrum we fall in, or somewhere in between, we are setting AN example.  It’s a constant battle within myself to remember that the example I give them now molds them into the adults they will be later.

Kids need to learn responsibility, be allowed to fall and learn from their mistakes.  We set the foundation.  Feed it to them a little at a time.  Sometimes it means stepping out of our comfort zone and trusting that foundation will be solid and help them step up into maturity.  One example and lesson at a time.

Parenting.  Sure isn’t for sissies, is it?

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.  Chinese proverb