Category Archives: God

When you thought no one was watching…

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I sat in my car early that morning, relaxed in the crisp air as the sun made its way into the sky and watched as quiet, sleepy children and coffee toting parents made their way to the football fields that would be our “home” for much of the day.  Our own son was warming up with his team and Hubby would be bringing the rest of the troops when the first game started at 9, and so I had a brief period of rare solitude.  And then it shattered.

Before I saw you, I heard you

You dropped so many F-bombs in 60-second period I lost count

“you should have been a girl, because you are acting like one”

F’ing Unbelievable

A boy about 9 stands outside the truck, gearing up for a day of football

A child I cannot see receives the venomous diatribe

Coming around the corner of her truck, we lock eyes

I am embarrassed for her, humiliated for her son, I drop my eyes

It doesn’t stop

Clenched jaw, uncensored words

A door slammed

Shut up.  I am not even talking to you.  Shut the F up.

I am frozen to my seat.

My eyes tear.

Kids push buttons.  Parents are stressed.  Tempers flare.  Who will be the grown up?

I’ve been here.  Not the F-bomb.  Not stupid.  But clenched jaws.  Unkind words.  Unloving actions.

I’ve been here.  I’ve been 9.  You are a pig.  You are a crybaby.  My father walks away.

We can be so awful to each other.

A door opens.  A sweaty head, tear-stained, furious boy of 9 stomps to the rear of the truck.

The silent brother hands him his equipment.

The mother continues to berate.  They walk away.

I am still frozen.  But my heart and my mind are praying.

Soften our hearts, Lord.  Help us to heal.  Open our eyes, Lord.  Help us to see.

I look for them throughout the morning and come up empty.

My mind continues to spin.  The devil taunts my cowardice.  My heart aches.

Game 1 over, I leave with my daughters while husband and son watch Game 2.

Sitting in the car, I tear out paper from a notebook, I write a letter.

I do not judge.  Parenting is hard.  I do not know the circumstances.

I do know what is right and what is wrong.  I do know what sears the soul.

I encourage forgiveness, healing.  I pray.  I bless.  I leave the letter on the windshield.

I leave the rest to God.

Did I do the right thing?  Will it make it worse?  Will she apologize?  Will he forgive?

I may never know.

God does.

He sees all.

All in favor of a two-day work week, say “Aye!”

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Since taking three days off of work to spend time with the kids for their Spring Break, my “week” is two days at work and PHEW!, I’m ready for the weekend.

I forgot how HARD being a stay-at-home mom was.  It’s been awhile, forgive me, but OH.  MY.  GOODNESS!!   The chores.  The needs to be met.  Errands to be run.  Sheesh.  Fortunately for me, I decided early on Monday (about half way through errand running) that these days off would be about bon-bons and chillaxin’.  The rest would take care of itself somewhere along the week.  And this is what my week consisted of:

  1. Monday-Wednesday at 9 a.m.  attending our church’s Lenten mission to hear Father Richard Leonard speak on the history of the church and Mary, discernment and God’s will in our lives and forgiveness and faith.  Tremendously uplifting and Living Water for this thirsty soul, right when I needed it.  Very cool how “GOD-planned” to offer this retreat on my EXACT days off.
  2. Monday, Tuesday, and today (Friday), hit the gym with my girlfriend and got our strength training on.  And abs.  And cardio.  You know it’s a good exercise week when you are still feeling it on Friday from Tuesday!
  3. I was able to have our girls’ BFFs over to play each day I was off.  The boys are older and do “their own deal”, but it was nice to be able to get them breakfast and lunch and run them around a bit as well.  Not to mention how great it felt to be able to help out some moms and provide a fun day for their girls.  Having “been there, done that”, it is always a happy feeling when you know your kids are having fun with their friends and not bored at home, coming up with new ways to irritate the you-know-what out of each other.
  4. Dinner was taken care of.  Monday:  chicken and rice for the fam and I went out with the girls to celebrate my girlfriend’s 12th annual 38th birthday!  Tuesday:  crock pot.  Wednesday:  leftovers.  See?  Dinner was taken care of.
  5. We hit the beach.  Every day.  See previous posts from this week…..Sunscreen aplenty, boogie boards, beach toys, snacks and water.  Recharged!
  6. We tried out a scrumptious cupcake bakery in town.  (sorry, no link, no web-based orders, local only)  My youngest daughter and I had a hard time picking out a dozen minis to share with everyone.  Though the price was quite affordable, the calories are simply not a luxury and we will be making a wide berth.  Except for special occasions.  Maybe.
  7. Book 3 of Hunger Games, “Mockingjay” is downloaded to my Kindle.  Which is charged.  I have to work today, however, my lunch hour and free time between football games this weekend will be consumed by Katniss, Gale and Peeta and wrapping up this depressing, yet fascinatingly addictive series.

Things that didn’t get taken care of this week:

  1. Laundry.
  2. Spring cleaning
  3. Reorganizing the pots and pans (a mess, let me assure you!)
  4. Reorganizing the spices and pantry (I want it all in ONE spot)
  5. Purging the girl’s toys
  6. Purging the boy’s clothes
  7. Purging my clothes

No big deal.  It’s still there and it WILL get done.  However, the world will go on regardless, right?

See what other’s weeks looked like @ Conversion Diary’s Friday Quick Takes with Jen Fulwiler!

Have a blessed weekend!

View from the pew, an 8 year old’s eyes

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We are enjoying Spring Break here, and it’s been a lovely week with truly amazing weather; this IS the reason people come to Florida’s beaches.  I’ve taken three days off (back to work today) with the kiddos and it’s been fun.  Coincidentally, our church had it’s Lenten mission this week the EXACT days I was off.  The speaker, Father Richard Leonard, a Jesuit priest from Australia was truly inspiring.  He had the perfect blend of history, theology, lightness, seriousness, delightful personal anecdotes with hilarious impressions of friends and family as well as a deep, strike-your-soul, baritone song and sung prayers.  (I’m sure I’ll blog (hopefully) later this week about the mission, however, I’m still processing the three days.) The talks were at 9 in the morning and repeated at 7 in the evening and since I was home, I hit the morning mission and hubby hit the evening ones.  Since I was home with kiddos, I brought varying children with me each day and on the second day let my 8 yo daughter play with my phone, as she was losing interest in the talk.  I enjoyed her vantage point of the church and small glimpse into her view of the church.

Baptismal font

Feet resting on the kneeler

Always fascinated by the organ pipes

Our seats "up close" to see better..(though this vantage point has room for improvement!)

Is she interested in which hymn we are singing next or the Exit?

She finds this banner colorful and SO COOL!

The power of prayer: for Lauren

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A few days ago I posted about my friend’s daughter, Lauren,  who would be having surgery to remove a benign, but troublesome, tumor from her head, as it is pressing on her brain.  Today is that day.  Lauren’s friend had set up a prayer chain so that she would be completely covered in prayer throughout the day.  I had the honor earlier this morning, although my prayers will continue throughout the day.  I have personally experienced the AWEsome power of prayer in my own life and difficult times and can attest to the fact that HE is a force to be reckoned with as Our Lord is inundated with intercessory prayers.  It is never too little or too late.  He is always there. Ready.  Waiting for us to seek Him.

I have no doubt Lauren, her husband, Chris, my dear friend and her husband and their two other daughters in community with all their friends and family will witness the amazing graces of God in response to the prayers of so many on behalf of one.  He can use ANYthing to His glory, even an ugly tumor in a tricky spot.

How “coincidental” that today’s Daily Readings are all about healing and the grace of God, the intercession of Christ and Faith in the One who has authored this story, who is the Healer, the Great Physician.

Psalm 46:8 The Lord of hosts is with us; our stronghold is the God of Jacob.

In your spare time today, won’t you lift up Lauren and her family?  Thanks, and may God Bless you.

 

Friday=Spring Break, Day1

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Spring Break for my kiddos, not me.  Not their teachers, as they post grades for the 3rd Nine weeks which means……folks, we are moving into the home stretch of the year.  HOLY!  COW!!  As once again, I scratch my head in wonder and confusion at how time DOES that!!!  And, so I’ll wrap up my week with Jen @ Conversion Diary and other people from around the globe as they wrap up THEIR week, too!  Happy Weekend!!

1.  Time change week.  I think…..just as we are adjusting to the time change we now go into Spring Break and will have a second transition week AFTER the break.  <sigh>  Well, at least I am off for  a few days and can enjoy a little sleep-in  here and there as well!

2.  I took our oldest to his HIGH SCHOOL REGISTRATION this week.  Again with the time clock.  OY!!!  He’s all signed up for classes.  Happy with his electives.  Relieved he gets a second chance at Algebra 1.  Looking forward to high school.  And I am just dazed wondering where my boy went who  was all about dump trucks, mud in the yard, tree climbing and Rescue Heroes.  <sniff>

3.  Bike Week 2012 is in full swing here.  LOUD. Congested.  Crazy sights.  Hope to get some pictures this weekend and share some of the zaniness that comes to us twice a year.  We try to lay low and stay out of the traffic though, so maybe we’ll just hit the beach instead…..

4.  Great gym time this week.  2 HARD days of strength training and lots of cardio.  Heading into spring in a good mindset.  Week 11 and still going strong.  Can’t say the same for the rest of the gym as it’s gotten much less congested the past few weeks as New Year’s Resolutions peter out. (which is GREAT for me on my lunch break!)

5.  Along with fixing the washer and sink sprayer, Hubby has also fixed the gate where out little Caramel the Cat likes to make a break for it and indulge his stray cat roots.  Dirty little stay-out.  He always comes home though.  Now, it appears he is relegated to the backyard and chasing lizards.  So long as no one shows him how to jump the fence we’ll be good.  For some reason, he hasn’t figured that out yet and I like it like that.  Hubby was rewarded with homemade chocolate chip cookies last night for all his efforts.

6.  Swapped out winter clothes for spring clothes and are taking stock of spring/summer needs.  WHAT am I feeding these children?????  My baby appears to be leaving the 7/8’s behind and entering the 10’s.  And my oldest daughter and I can almost share shoes.  WTH?!?!?!??  She’s 10.  Our boys are 5’8″ and 5’10” @ 12 and 14.  We may need to trade the cat for a cow and dig up the yard for an organic garden or just stop feeding them.  For now, I am just singing the praises of Aldi and Hubby is getting in tight with the Produce stand people…..

7.  Three days off next week.  Thank goodness.  I need a break.  Work is crazy.  I am getting burnt out.  Am having a hard time compartmentalizing patients and their illnesses/diagnoses lately since I  have had far too much bad/sad news lately:   a)my daughter’s 8 yo friend diagnosed with a tumor in her chest and surgery this week to remove it (still waiting to hear how she’s doing), b)my girlfriend’s 30yo daughter diagnosed with a (so far) benign brain tumor to be removed Tuesday with a risky and complex surgery and c)another friend with a recurrence of ovarian cancer cells and will re-start chemo in a week.  UGH.  UGH.  UGH.  Why is life so hard sometimes?  A reminder to embrace each day and to let the petty stuff slide and remember what is truly important and that God has it all under control far better than we EVER could imagine.

God Bless and Happy Weekend!!